Goodbye November

At work today in the library someone had the one day stamper set to "November 31st" instead of December 1st. I really wish they were right and I was wrong but unfortunately that's not the case. It's not just because I have so much crap due for class next week it's like I'm stuck under a steam roller that has already crushed me up to my knees, but also because tomorrow is the beginning of the advent season and I'm not really looking forward to Christmas this year.

You see, this will by the first Christmas without my grandmother, and the first Thanksgiving without my Grandmother was awkward enough. The difference is my Grandparents only came to my house for Thanksgiving (due to my parents being awesome at cooking), so the rest of my family wasn't involved. As much as I love my family's closeness, they tend to veer towards the dramatic, and nothing is more dramatic than this. We've always observed the same traditions every year, and it always seemed to revolve around the kids and my grandparents.

Last year the drama was centered around my drug using, knocked up for a second time cousin, but luckily it didn't have anything to do with me and I happily avoided those arguments and that tension. This year it seems unavoidable, and I'm afraid if one little stupid thing goes wrong there's going to be fits of crying and yelling and all sorts of Christmas cheer like that.

My Grandfather has had two heart attacks, and isn't really far behind his late wife. I love them both dearly. My grandmother was the sweetest most cool-tempered woman in the world. I certainly don't get my attitude from her. My grandfather on the other hand is more of the angry Archie Bunker archetype who's only happy when he's miserable, but he's a good man with his own charms. Lately he's been trying to get rid of his money, giving out 10k a piece to each one of his four daughters, my mother and aunts. One of my cousins however owes him a few thousand, and he's not going to be seeing it anytime soon, so he decided to take the money from their 10k instead of waiting to be repaid. This has ignited a lot of controversy over what he should be doing with his money. My uncle claims that they shouldn't be held accountable for what his son owes my grandfather, but his son is also struggling to raise kids with very little money and driving a tractor trailer for a living. He's looking a gift horse in the mouth and should be more than thankful that my grandfather is willing to wipe my cousin's slate clean and alleviate his debt. Maybe my uncle was just hoping my grandfather would kick the bucket before my cousin had to pay any of it back. I don't know. What I do know is that it's my grandfather's money and he should be allowed to do what he wants with it.

Personally I don't care about the money though I'm going to be 15 grand in debt at the end of college like most people. We've got some money put aside already and hopefully I'll have a job and health insurance (hopefully) and everything will be fine, best case scenario. I don't even want a single thing from the house because they're my grandparents, I love them, I don't care about the material possessions. I they need to leave me with are memories and the role they had in helping to raise me into the man I am today.

My grandfather was in the military and he has a sword hanging in the living room that he showed to me when I was a little kid, practically a toddler, though I still remember him sitting on the couch and taking it out of the sheathe for me. He told me that when he died I could have it. My aunt, the same one who isn't getting the full 10k this round of money-handing-out demanded that her son should get it, the same son that caused her to not receive the full 10k, because he was the first grandson. Honestly, I don't care, what infuriates me is the nit-picking and in-fighting that they're doing over my grandparent's possessions, things that I'll have a hard time even looking at once my grandfather is gone. My mother shares a similar sentiment. The only thing she wants out of the house is a pencil drawing we had done of my grandparents and all the grandchildren because it has sentimental value to her.

This is most likely going to be the topic of my Christmas this year. And I have to tell you. It's depressing as hell. I was close to my grandfather when I was little with at least weekly phone conversations so that we could watch professional wrestling together on TV (back when it was a bit more wholesome than it is today). I've had many, many happy Christmases with my family, but I'm afraid that this year everyone will be at each other's throats, preparing for the inevitable. It's like looters waiting for the next natural disaster to occur.

Republicans vs. The Internet

So here I am blogging about the CNN Youtube debate like all the other cruddy bloggers out there. The real reason is I have some downtime and classes/projects have been pretty stressful lately as the semester winds down.

I've been paying attention to both parties this coming election unlike 2004 which was blatantly "Anyone but Bush." I might be paying more attention to the Republicans if only to assure myself that it can't get any worse than where we are right now. Anyway I feel like a fair portion of America does right now with neither side having done anything to excite or impress me. Our Democratic majority congress certainly hasn't.

The CNN Youtube debate is an interesting concept. In theory it should allow average people to ask questions to political candidates in a nation wide forum. In practice CNN just picks questions they would've asked anyway, but they're able to poke fun in ways they'd never be able to do thanks to their professionalism. For example they had somebody wave a bible in front of the candidates to test their religious beliefs and, true to Youtube form, had a guy with an acoustic guitar sing a song about the current political climate. CNN tried to create the illusion that the people were asking the questions but it wasn't really any different than any other debate except for some additional drama like an openly gay retired general challenging "don't ask don't tell."

In any case the debate was very telling and probably important in terms of who's going to win the primaries. Rudi Giuliani was very middle of the road, and is practically liberal on things like religion and abortion. I would support him more if he didn't come off as a bit hot-headed as he teased Mitt Romney about the illegal immigrants he employed to work at his mansion. The two front-runners argued like it was a forum flame war in front of the entire nation. Giuliani is a good guy, and he's proven that by doing a lot of great things for New York. I think people are selling him a little short when they're saying that he's just using 9/11 for his run at the presidency. Don't get me wrong, he probably is just using 9/11 fame for his campaign but at least he's got it more together than the other candidates and he's more centrist and isn't afraid to not agree with his party 100% of the time. He needs to work on that whole allowing torture like water boarding to be legal though. Most of the candidates on both the Republican and Democratic side have a stance on Homeland Security that I think is unacceptable. I can't believe how many people can sleep at night while supporting the Patriot Act.

Romney on the other hand is taking the opposite approach to Giuliani. The Mormon is obviously going for the Evangelical's love, and it's hard to blame him since the dumb fucks put Bush into office twice. I don't think he's very sincere about it though, he looks like a rat and he sounds like a rat. Fred Thompson's only triumph of the night (which was also a blunder because he submitted a negative advertisement to be aired during the debate) was to show a video of Mitt Romney in his youth saying that he supported Roe v Wade. Romney recovered by saying people change their decisions and he admitted he was wrong and we should all want a president that can admit he's wrong. Okay, sure, I used to be pro-life myself but the way Romney handled the issue of abortion is that it's a horrible unforgivable crime. Even though I'm pro-choice now I can still agree and work with what some pro-lifers have to say. I have a hard time believing anyone of even a tiny bit of intelligence would all of a sudden vehemently oppose something that they used to agree with without at least settling for some middle ground or understanding where the opposition's argument is coming from. He was also the only candidate who said he believed every single word in the bible. Literally. People already hate the fact that he's Mormon so I doubt it'll help him out much. It's safe to say that this slime-bag is my least desired candidate and his reign would result in four more years of the current state of the United States.

There's Mike Huckabee who tried to steal the show with a few lame jokes, taking pot shots at both the other candidates and the questions. People like him and he might gain some steam through that. He's also a minister who'll attract the evangelical vote. I don't think he's got the right stuff to be President and he's just hoping to coast to the White House on his image alone.

Fred Thompson... what about him? He's a waste of time. He basically admitted that he's going to cut funding to Social Security... uhm.... excuse me I mean "reform" Social Security. My bad. Totally not the same thing when the question is "What three government programs would you cut funding too to help alleviate the national debt?" He seemed pretty unprepared and definitely not in the same league as the other guys in terms of public speaking and likability with the general public. He's just your quintessential "old white guy" republican.

John McCain was McCain as always. Love him or hate him, I at least respect him. He seems like the most grounded, and one of the most intelligent, members of the Republican party. I don't agree with him on most of the issues but he has a "tells it like it is" attitude and has been willing to work with Democrats in the past to get things done. I think he's got the most experience and the best track record to be president if God is real and the Republicans prayed to him hard enough to win the election. He played on his Vietnam vet credibility, something he always does, to crush Mitt Romney in an argument about water boarding defying the Geneva Convention. He hates the war as much as any Democrat, and most words that come out of his mouth actually tend to make sense. I wouldn't vote for him, but I'd vote for him over anyone else at this debate. Unfortunately he doesn't really have a chance. He's tried this in the past and he's always failed because he has far too many enemies in the Republican Party and he doesn't pander to the massive voting block of brainwashed Evangelicals.

Finally there's Ron Paul. Holy shit Ron Paul. I can go on for hours about him but I won't. There's a few things I whole-heartedly agree with him about. Getting rid of NAFTA for one, and getting the fuck out of Iraq for two. Unfortunately he's also just a crazy libertarian and an isolationist. America has done a lot of damage to its image overseas in the last six or seven years and nows not the time for us to cut ourselves off from the world community and become a xenophobic powder keg. His push to get us back on the gold standard would probably also end in complete economic disaster though I doubt congress would ever let him do it if he was president. If Ron Paul had any ounce of brain, which he does not because he's not anymore intelligent than my 10th grade libertarian History professor, he'd run as a third party candidate, something that a large number of Americans are looking for right now. This was addressed by one Youtube question and he said that he was a Republican and he wouldn't do it. Unfortunately that means when the Republicans obviously don't pick him because he's insane, then if he runs as a third party candidate, people will call him a liar and a (I hate this term because it destroyed Kerry) a "flip-flopper." I do hope he runs though because he'll wind up splitting the vote. His massive following of Internet failures and white supremacy groups is another warning sign that you should stay away from Ron Paul. Oh, and he's from Texas.

Well that about wraps it up. We'll be seeing a lot of Romney vs. Giuliani and Clinton vs. Obama as we near the start of the primaries. It'll be good to see how they actually go after hearing all these predictions and poll results. If you're a die hard Republican or a die hard Democrat I can't recommend to you enough than to watch what the other side has to offer before you make your decision, and for the love of these United States don't be a single issue voter. Just because you're registered for one party doesn't mean you can't cross over and vote for somebody else. I feel a little hypocritical saying that because I'm a Democrat and I'll most likely vote Democrat. In any case, vote for who you think will be the better president, not for who will save the most unborn babies.

A Comic about Crohn's Disease

I suffer from Ulcerative Colitis, an irritable bowel disorder that involuntarily controls just about every aspect of my life. It's a hard to talk about, embarrassing disease that hurts as much physically as it does socially and emotionally.

It's something that I like to keep from people if I can, many of my friends unaware that I'm ill even though I'm wracked with pain or tortured because I need to run to the bathroom multiple times during certain social situations.

There's just no good way to talk about it, and it could be worse. It's not life threatening at least and I have a pretty happy life regardless.

In any case an artist by the name of Tom Humberstone created the comic "Everything You Never Wanted to Know About Crohn's Disease," which is the same type of ailment as Ulcerative Colitis. The comic is funny though the topic is serious, it made me smile as much as it tried to jerk a few tears out of my eyes. I've been through much of the same pain and the same situations as Tom even though his disease started when he was much younger than mine did (my freshman year of college).

You can find the comic at here. It's an absolutely excellent work in my opinion though I admit it kind of has some special meaning to me. I'll definitely use it in the future if I ever find myself in another situation where I have to explain my illness.